Should I Call His Girlfriend (Wife) and Tell Her about Us?

Blog Lady on PhoneIf you are reading this, maybe its  been on your mind to call your lover’s girlfriend and tell her about you and him. Don’t feel bad,  a lot of women get  that urge. However, it’s the woman that makes the right choice that comes out a winner in the end.

So what is the right choice?  Making the call or not making the call?  It may seem making the call is the right thing to do, but  the outcome may not be what you expect.  Making that call is risky business.  Ask yourself, is it really worth it?


Here’s a Few “Reasons” For Making That Call:

A lot of times women think if they make “that  phone call” they can stir up a little trouble between their lover and his “main girlfriend”. This trouble can make the main girlfriend jealous and/or mad and can lead to things like:

1. The main girlfriend will leave him

2. The main girlfriend will argue with him and they’ll be at odds for a while

3. The main girlfriend will know about You

4. You feel he’ll be with you when they break up

5. You’ll get satisfaction from making the main girlfriend feel she isn’t the only one

6. Revenge on the main girlfriend for whatever reason

7. Revenge on your lover for whatever reason ( ie hurting your feelings, making you mad, or doing more for her.. etc)

While this may seem like a cool plan, the truth is making “that phone call”  could put you on the losing end. Some men in these kinds of situations are only true to you until you are discovered by the “main girlfriend”.  He may seem like he’s into you and will never leave but as soon as the main girlfriend finds out he’s been cheating, his whole attitude about you and him can change.

Here are some things that can change after you make that call:

When he was coming over everyday, he’s now coming over once a week because his main girlfriend is now heavily tracking his every move. When he would pick you up at your house, he’s now asking you to meet him at distant locations.  Now that you’ve made “that phone call” and his girlfriend knows about you,  he isn’t as free to be with you as he was before.

Then too after “that phone call” a lot of other things can happen.  He could try to be more attentive to the main girlfriend to try to make up. He may even stop seeing you for a while until he can get his main girlfriend to calm down.  Also, he may get upset with you for calling his girlfriend which could dampen his “trust” in you.  These are common things a cheating man will do.

Not to mention, if the main girlfriend is revengeful, she may try to cause you trouble or try to cause you or your property harm.

At times too, the main girlfriend will stay in a relationship with her cheating man thinking that will keep him from seeing you again. This can make you feel you have not accomplished anything. Even worse, you may have your eyes opened to the fact that he’s not leaving his main girlfriend.

On the flip side though, there’s a chance that after you make the call you’ll accomplish what you set out to do, but I can assure you this won’t mean riding off into the sunset with your man and living happily ever after.  Your man may not be so ready to do that considering how all this happened.

Most times women regret having made “that phone call”.

Getting Revenge on Your Lover or Ex

If you are thinking about making “that phone call” for pure revenge on your lover or ex-lover. Ask yourself is it worth it? At the end of the day you want to walk away with your dignity. If you walked into the relationship a lady.. leave like a lady.  The best revenge you can give him is to let him have his relationship.  It’s obvious the relationship he’s in isn’t all that he wants it to be, because he’s seeing you on the side.  So it’s his loss he can’t enjoy life with you.

If you walk away like a lady, he’ll see what he’s truly missing out on. Don’t nut up on him…Always keep your grace and inner beauty in tact and he’ll always remember that about you and may just discover he really does love you and want to be with you.  You don’t want him to remember you as the nut case or a woman that causes problems. Leave that burden for him to carry.

Dealing with the Urge to Make that Call

Keep in mind you are the other woman, not the main girlfriend. You are in fact in somebody’s else’s relationship. It’s hard to sometime put yourself in the main girlfriend shoes, but really if the main girlfriend knows nothing about you, she’s just being with her man  just like any other woman. She’s not purposely trying to hurt you, or purposely trying to have the best of him.  She’s just doing what any woman does in their relationship and going about her day as normal.

Jealously, revenge and low self-esteem are driving factors behind making “that phone call”  which can never lead to anything pretty.  You should think twice before calling your lover’s girlfriend. There’s never a good reason to call.  If you are with a man that is unavailable, then you agreed to do just that and take all that comes with it. Even if you found out late in the game that he had a girlfriend, if at that moment you chose to stay, then you have signed your name on the dotted line to accept that.

If  you feel you need more than what he can give there’s two things you can do. ( 1. )  Consider finding a man that is available to love you 100%.  or (2.)  Talk to him and find out whats really on his mind about whats going on at home.  This way  you’ll know what he can realistically give to the “relationship” he has with you. Any action outside of this, like calling his main girlfriend is just you causing trouble. Because at the end of the day, no one is twisting your arm to put up with anything you don’t like.

It will take a BIG woman to either deal with what you signed up for or walk away from it.

This is real talk, giving it to you straight, no chaser here.

Please leave your comments below…how do you feel about this?

You should Also Read: Being involved with a Man Who’s Already in a Relationship

Become the Woman Men Adore


Written by Candace Harrison



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